18-1: Satan’s Team Falls
New York Giants 17 Satan’s Team 14
I would like to take this moment to apologize to someone. A person who I never truly believed in. A NFL player who I thought would choke on the biggest stage. A New York Giants’ quarterback who I believed would be swallowed alive by the New England Patriots Satan’s Team. This person. This NFL player. This New York Giants’ quarterback is Eli Manning. Easy “Motherf*ckin” E has become a legend. Number 10 and his posse have silenced all the critics by upsetting the Patriots 17-14. I’m sure Tiki Barber is somewhere contemplating to either swallow some pills or slit his writs.
I know there are a great number of non-Patriot fans that are upset. These people wanted to see the perfect season. That special moment they could share with their loved ones. Well, cheer up people because something special did happen at Super Bowl XLII. Ten, twenty, thirty years from now you’ll be able to tell the story of a great evil that threatened the NFL. And that sinister unholy essence was destroyed by a man that became a legend on February 3, 2008…Easy “Motherf*ckin” E.
THE PLAY…
Manning’s Easy E’s 32 yard pass to David Tyree will be talked about until the end of time. That play is easily one of the greatest in Super Bowl history. You could have shot E will a 12 gauge and he wouldn’t have gone down. And Tyree making an amazing “helmet catch” over the HGH enhanced Rodney Harrison was the icing on the cake. Mmmmm mmm mmmm!!
Now that the Pats have failed – people will surely be jumping off the bandwagon, the Giants will be getting a case of the finest Dom Perignon from the 1972 Dolphins, and all this greatest team of all time talk will come to an end. Indeed Satan is very very angry. And after watching the classless way Bill Belichick handled the situation after the game – I’m positive he’ll need a few bottles of Absinthe (look it up).
Oh, and I almost forgot. I said on the David Stein show that I would donate 20 bucks to charity every time Tom Brady got sacked in the Super Bowl. He got nailed five times – so I will be writing a check for $100. Money well spent I might add. Not just because Pretty Boy Brady got roughed up, but because I will be sending the money to a battered women’s shelter.
And no, that doesn’t mean I’m sending my donation to the Patriots’ wives. Even though they might need it quick, fast, and in a hurry.
[Eli, monster defense power Giants to shocking Super Bowl victory]
I never understood interventions. What’s the point of being told you drink too much from a room full of reasons why you drink in the first place?
Posted: February 4, 2008 at 7:00 am | by Ryan
Filed under: Sports
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