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Joey Styles on JBL and ECW One Night Stand DVD
JBL'S VERBAL ASSAULTS ON ECW INCLUDED ON ECW ONE NIGHT STAND DVD...AND MY RESPONSES 
By: Joey Styles
6/29/2005 9:40:34 AM
For some inexplicable reason, WWE decided to include JBL's live microphone commentary from the balcony as alternate commentary on the ECW ONE NIGHT STAND DVD. Why anyone would chose to forego the exciting and insigtful announcing on that show (who was that play-by-play man?) to listen to JBL's beer-induced verbal diarrhea is beyond me. Therefore, you can read Yosimite Sam's comments here and ignore that option on the DVD:
As Masato Tanaka makes his entrance, JBL says "That's my doorman" (Note from Joey Styles: JBL making a racial joke that all Asians look alike...how original.)
As Tommy Dreamer makes his entrance, JBL says, "This is the main event?" (Note from Joey Styles: Yes, you can tell by the sellout crowd standing...and we didn't give away tickets or beer...except to you guys. We could have sold those seats too.)
As Sandman looks under the ring for weapons, JBL says "What's he looking for now, a treadmill or an oxygen tank?" (Note from Joey Styles: OK, that one is actually funny and Sandman will tell you so himself.)
As the BWO comes make their entrance, JBL says "And you wonder why ECW went out of business" (Note from Joey Styles: Thank heaven WWE decided not to put a silly superhero gimmick on Nova (because it was already stolen) and make him into Tony Little...now that's a money gimmick!)
Regarding The Blue Meanie: "Fat f--- with blue hair. Go find your porn star wife!" (Note fron Joey Styles: I don't believe Jasmin St. Clair and Meanie were ever married.)
As Stevie Richards/Big Stevie Cool was doing his promo "Get to the point. Go home now." (Note from Joey Styles: This is the same sentiment expressed towards you by the sold out house at the event and the hundreds of thousands watching on pay-per-view.)
Regarding Balls Mahoney & Axl Rotten, "Who are the fat guys who came in?" (Note from Joey Styles: As I said to Eric Bischoff on the air, "We can tune in to RAW and watch bodybuilders learn how to work on live TV.")
Regarding the main event: "This could be awful. I gotta be drunk for this one." (Note: JBL probably was drunk by this point which may explain why he couldn't even knock down The Blue Meanie with his best punches. Not a bad accounting for a "fat f*ck with blue hair" huh?)
Regarding Lance Storm, "You can hear the paint dry. Here comes the most boring man in the history of boring. Lance Storm couldn't fill an arena if you gave free beer and free tickets. (Note from Joey Styles: The Hammerstein Ballroom looked pretty full to me and I anxiously await the buyrate of ECW ONE NIGHT STAND so I can compare it to every recent pay-per-view JBL appeared on).
Finally, I am sure Mr. John Layfield was making his comments in character as his wrestling persona, JBL. Therfore, I want to make clear that I am writing this in character as my wrestling persona, Joey Styles. After all, it's just a work, right?
By: Joey Styles
6/29/2005 9:40:34 AM
For some inexplicable reason, WWE decided to include JBL's live microphone commentary from the balcony as alternate commentary on the ECW ONE NIGHT STAND DVD. Why anyone would chose to forego the exciting and insigtful announcing on that show (who was that play-by-play man?) to listen to JBL's beer-induced verbal diarrhea is beyond me. Therefore, you can read Yosimite Sam's comments here and ignore that option on the DVD:
As Masato Tanaka makes his entrance, JBL says "That's my doorman" (Note from Joey Styles: JBL making a racial joke that all Asians look alike...how original.)
As Tommy Dreamer makes his entrance, JBL says, "This is the main event?" (Note from Joey Styles: Yes, you can tell by the sellout crowd standing...and we didn't give away tickets or beer...except to you guys. We could have sold those seats too.)
As Sandman looks under the ring for weapons, JBL says "What's he looking for now, a treadmill or an oxygen tank?" (Note from Joey Styles: OK, that one is actually funny and Sandman will tell you so himself.)
As the BWO comes make their entrance, JBL says "And you wonder why ECW went out of business" (Note from Joey Styles: Thank heaven WWE decided not to put a silly superhero gimmick on Nova (because it was already stolen) and make him into Tony Little...now that's a money gimmick!)
Regarding The Blue Meanie: "Fat f--- with blue hair. Go find your porn star wife!" (Note fron Joey Styles: I don't believe Jasmin St. Clair and Meanie were ever married.)
As Stevie Richards/Big Stevie Cool was doing his promo "Get to the point. Go home now." (Note from Joey Styles: This is the same sentiment expressed towards you by the sold out house at the event and the hundreds of thousands watching on pay-per-view.)
Regarding Balls Mahoney & Axl Rotten, "Who are the fat guys who came in?" (Note from Joey Styles: As I said to Eric Bischoff on the air, "We can tune in to RAW and watch bodybuilders learn how to work on live TV.")
Regarding the main event: "This could be awful. I gotta be drunk for this one." (Note: JBL probably was drunk by this point which may explain why he couldn't even knock down The Blue Meanie with his best punches. Not a bad accounting for a "fat f*ck with blue hair" huh?)
Regarding Lance Storm, "You can hear the paint dry. Here comes the most boring man in the history of boring. Lance Storm couldn't fill an arena if you gave free beer and free tickets. (Note from Joey Styles: The Hammerstein Ballroom looked pretty full to me and I anxiously await the buyrate of ECW ONE NIGHT STAND so I can compare it to every recent pay-per-view JBL appeared on).
Finally, I am sure Mr. John Layfield was making his comments in character as his wrestling persona, JBL. Therfore, I want to make clear that I am writing this in character as my wrestling persona, Joey Styles. After all, it's just a work, right?